In the fall of last year, I determined that 2014 would be the year of "Now Is My Time" after several years of being quite overdrawn in family commitments, deployment and health issues. It was time to make my number one priority my own health and well-being.
It has been quite a journey, filled to highs and lows, new realizations and old habits and mindsets to escape from and destroy. This is nothing new, it is life, but taking a more focused approach to living my best life has been a fantastic experience.
As I was thinking about how I wanted to wrap up this year, I began thinking about all the things that had changed for the better this year. Then I wondered what I do with the things that I can't force to change. There are things in life we have little control over, such as the actions of others, events that are forced upon us and things that just aren't bound to change just because we want them too.
We can let these things keep eating at us or we can find a way to distance ourselves from the stress, anxiety, frustration and sadness these things can bring at us. Once we have done whatever good we can do, we have to find a way to stop our suffering and live in peace with the things we cannot change.
I have always thought of these things as rocks we pick up by our own choice or experiences that come to us and they get put in our "life backpacks" and we carry them around with us every day. They weigh us down, tire our backs, discourage us and often we just keep carrying and carrying them with no relief.
So I decided that at the end of this year I needed to come up with a way to let go of things I could not changed that continue to create pain and suffering in my life. I am ready to yank these rocks out of my life backpack and leave them on the side of the road for God to take care of.
These were things I could not just "goal set" away. As I take a look back, and account for what I tried to accomplish, what successes I had and what I've learned that I can carry forward with me, there is still a list of things I can't change.
The idea of Let Go and Let God came to me and I decided to create a small jar with a picture of Jesus on it...and perhaps even decorate it a bit with some gold "miraculous" glitter for good measure. Then in this jar on small strips of paper I will write each one of the rocks in my life backpack that I want to remove and then symbolically remove them and place it in the jar.
No more will it burden me, and I will have to have the faith to let God take that for me and heal me from the tiredness and frustration of carrying that rock around and suffering under weight I no longer need to suffer from.
I've been keeping a few notes and am looking forward to taking some time for myself during the holidays (yes, it's still my time and I still need to make time for me, haha) to end the year by giving to God what I don't need to carry anymore. I think this will give me a nice clean slate to work from going into the new year. I'm excited to start a new year and raise the banner on my new mantra for 2015.
Do you have a few rocks you'd like to remove from your life backpack as this year comes to a close? What would that look like for you? How would that change how you feel about your life?